been busy..

just got home.. rest for the last 3 days.. been working for 3 weeks before that.. stress?? love it.. work?? love it more.. by working i gain experience that i never would get but i get.. and by making myself busy i forgotten the world that i live in.. the world with problems, boys, arguments and things that can make my blood pressure rise up.. for 3 weeks i laugh a lot.. a real laugh.. with my friends.. we did have some arguments but it was ok after min or so.. it was a fun journey.. from perlis to pasir gudang johor.. during the day we shoot and in the night we travel to our next destination.. we ate a lot without any hesitation.. different places, different kind of enviroment.. but all that we think about is doing our job.. finish it up before the rain comes, before the light of day are gone.. with my roomate, its a very funny story.. we talk a lot.. we laugh a lot.. we even make jokes a lot too.. i love her for that.. we took care of each other all the way.. friendship is the best thing when u really care for that someone.. my burden is hers and hers is mine..

now, im my room again.. all the problems are coming back.. the past, now and the future.. im trying my best to get a job.. and be free.. i pray to god, Allah S.W.T to give me guidence and patience.. with a little of happiness..

My feeling now.

Lost my feelings, how can i find it? does it come just like that.
does it come in a hot saucy beef meal? beef steak?
drinking? smoking? driving around fast?
when it will come again? where is it?

You know the song heartless? well, i think im being one now.
don't really care about others. just about me and what i want.
well, a little maybe.. been thinking more about my friends happiness..
how to pleased them too much... hiking on their boat instead of mine alone.
the thing is i dont really know how to start.
how to kill the past love hurt before. to not do it again. to not be so traumatized.
to just feel free and be single.

How did people do it. how did people live with it.
just act happy and smile?? what the hell is that.
yeah, ive been doing it. its so fucking annoying.
im sorry for my language,
nobody is so perfect. all they can do is try. right?
so, how i'ma gonna do this. how to kill the feeling..
how to know how i feel..
i cried, oh, yes i did. but not for the hurt. but for the loneliness i felt.
the feeling of not having a feeling. i know this doesn't make sense.
but it is how i feel. its such a confusing feeling.

i need chocolate cookies dip in a hot milk.. need my own holiday..

gettin' bored with guys..

Gettin' bored with GUYS

im really sorry.. but i am.. all this years ive been with random different kind off guys.. all i do is making sure that they are happy with me.. and really trying to make the relationship work.. all they think about is having me around as their so called girl and just want me whenever they want to.. oh f*ck it.. im done.. no more love for me for awhile.. im tired.. im going to think about myself.. my family and friends.. and mostly god.. no more guy problems in my life.. just me, my family and friends..

in the future when my life is well balance ill think about them.. when the right guy comes, no no no! i dont want a guy.. I want a MAN, a grown up MAN.. with his own job, money,house and a car.. me? i want myself to be independent.. a career, my own house and my own ride.. that MAN have to except me and knows how to make it work.. pls not only me, but both of us must make it work.. you know what i mean.. u cant fly a plane with only one wings..

okay maybe this is it for now.. need to sleep..

love,

single but not available..

hurm.. a single life when im in my 20S.. what should i do?
list:

• Love my self off course.. spa? ( at home) checked
• Go out on a holiday.. with family.. checked and going on the 8th.. Penang here i come..
  
• Have lots and lots of friends.. but mostly girls..
• Wont care about other people "bitching" about me.
• Just follow with the flow..
• Now my family comes first. then my friends..
• Go out and have fun..
• Be more sexier ( huhu.. il try)
• Read lots and lots of books.. knowledge is good..
  
• Have fun eating.. well, not seafood off course.. allergic remember..
  
• But at the same time ill try and be slim.. need a gym for that.. :p
• Try and be good to god..
• Smile all i can..
• Stop flirting and focused for my future..
• Get a job..
• Try and forget the past.. :)

p/s: pray for me okay.. muax!

for now..

basically my life is such a waste lately.. been thinking about life and never do anything about it.. i know im a terrible person.. i just want to settle up things one by one..

firstly my love life.. ive asked my 4 years relationship guy to break up with me.. but i screw it up.. i took him back.. i dont know why but i did it, maybe the love of pain was still in me (ive always heard that :"love hurts" well, it does, and i think i love getting myself hurt) .. and instead of making it work i ignore him we did contact tho ( weird i know).. im still hurt by his attitude towards me before.. i dont know how can i erased it..

but i consider myself single still for awhile.. let my mind breath a little..

lately my guy friends suddenly told me that they like me more than their friends.. i feel really awkward.. they do treat me nicely but its so not going to happen.. we have been friends for ages and i dont want to change anything..

seriously i dont know what i want in my life right now.. my friends told me to start thinking about myself.. which one will make me happy.. which one will treat me better.. which one whom doesnt make me cry every single night..

suddenly ive been thinking about what is love.. is it about someone who cares about me or someone whom just like me to care about him?? hurm..

i am tired.. thinking about this situation makes my brain pops out of my head.. i did try and smile.. be happy and have fun.. go to club and just dance my ass off.. smoke while i can (shh.. dont tell anyone) .. im usually not like this.. seriously.. suddenly life is so cramp up.. argh! been thinking about going out and have fun with my friends now.. i need to think about my future..
mostly, i need a holiday.. (cant wait to go and holiday in penang early next month) :)

its been too long..

my life is so hectic now days.. been singing and dancing... working my ass up till i cant breath... i just need to make myself busy.. to think that life is all about work and nothing else.. yes, i have to think about love but not always... it hurts... for me it comes and go whenever it wants to.. i just have to wait... instead of me waiting let me make myself busy... without no one notice.. without me thinking about crying anymore...

i dont know why im writing like this... im just going to post this.. no idea for the moment..

ANother version off : leaving on a jetplane..

YOUR LEAVING ON AN AIRPLANE.
..........................................................................................................................
all his bags are packed,

his ready to go,
I'm standing here outside alone,
i love you but your saying goodbye,
well the ice are melting,
this freezing morn,
the ship is sailing,
its blowing their hon,
already i fell lonely i could die


[Chorus:]
so love me and stay in me,
tell me that you'll come for me,
then hold me and never let me go,
cause you're leaving on an airplane,
but i know you'll be coming back again,
so please, i love you so..

there's so many times I've made u mad,
so many times I've made you sad,
but baby you know
they don't mean a thing,
everyplace you go,
please think of me,
every song i heard,
you sang for me,
when you come back home,
ill make you stay with me.

[Chorus]

now its time you go leaving me,
need more time,
for me to kiss,
close my eyes,
you'll be on your way,
dream about our days to come,
when we wont have to leave alone,
about the time when you don't have to say...

[Chorus]

Leaving on an airplane

[repeat]

HIS GOING TO MIRI, SARAWAK, MALAYSIA. SO SAD. HURM. ITS A SACRIFICE, RIGHT? HAVE TO ENDURE THIS SAD FEELING.. MUST SHOW HIM THAT I'LL BE FINE HERE. SMILE WHILE I CAN. MUST STOP THE CRYING.. ITS NOT THAT HIS GOING TO WAR.. JUST GOING THERE AND STUDY FOR MAYBE 4 YEARS.. THAT'S SO LONG.. ITS LIKE OUR RELATIONSHIP COUNTDOWN NOW. 14 SEPTEMBER 2009 IS OUR 4TH ANNIVERSARY. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO NOW.. SO HELPLESS.. NO ONE WILL EVER UNDERSTAND. HOPEFULLY...

the lyric, its something..

i found this lyric while Google-ink the second serenade lyric.. read it carefully... its really something.. mostly when they started to say " if you...".. because it is so true.. HAPPY hunting..

NO MERCY pictures - please don't go..

Please don't go

Please don't go

Don't you know that I love you so

say you're mine

and give me tonight

let's stay together

Please don't go

Please don't go

You're the only angel I know

You were sent from heaven above

to love me forever



Don't go

Don't go



If you leave me

You'll let a good thing fall apart

If you deceive me

You'll leave a pain inside my heart

I really need you

Just like the air I need to breathe

I'll stand beside you

I'll never leave



CHORUS



If you leave me

You're gonna spoil a dream we share

If you leave me

I'm gonna miss the way you cared

I will try harder

I'll make you fall in love again

and I'll be thankful

until the end



Please don't go

Please don't go

You're the only angel I know

You were sent from heaven above

to love me forever



Don't go



If you leave me

I'm gonna search the world for you

If you leave me

Sweet memories will shine on through

I'll always love you

no matter what you do or say

'cause when I touch you

light touches the day



Please don't go

Please don't go

I don't to be all alone

say you're mine and give me tonight

let's stay together

Please don't go

Please don't go

You're the only angel I know

you were sent from heaven above

to love me forever



Don't go

NOTE TO HIM : "PLEASE DON'T GO"

about me..? silly me...

tagged by RENEE..

balas dendam hah u... huhuhuhu... nevermind...

Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it’s because I want to know more about you.

1. i love choc and coffee and diet coke... but i cant have it, got some stupid disease..

2. if im happy ill say hai to all the people..

3. if im not i wont say it.

4. if im sad and wanted to cry ill annoy people.

5. if im not smiling do not annoy me or ask me stupid questions.

6. i love eating snacks...

7. if i gain weight ill crash diet.. no rice, no beef or chicken... well, maybe ill eat a little.. huhuhu

8. if i have work to be done i cant sleep until i finish it..

9. im head over heels with my boy.. hurm... dont really know bout him lor...

10. i love mummy, and my family.

11. i love movies!! mostly i like when a hero or heroin gets killed.

12. i dont want to go grow up.. but mummy ask me to..

13. i miss my childhood days. dont really have to think about money or life.. just have fun..

14. i miss kicking and punching people.. *oh, the sweet days..

15. i want to an island alone.. and relax myself.. miss my being alone days..

16. i love hugging people.. especially mummy...

17. i love my ass... always talk bout it..

18. i love dancing.. i can express my feelings with it..

19. sleeping is my life..

20. my friends is my life too.. without them ill be drowning in the river, not the sea..

21. my goals 1stly is having my own house.

22. 2nd, my own cars.. 2 at least..

23. 3rdly i want to make my own cash.. my own succesful career...

24. then maybe lastly ill think about marriage.. huhuhu... maybe when im 30 years old..

25. i want to adopt a child.. and yes, ill try to have my own.. no worries.. can i have a kid when
im 30?? hurm... insyaallah...

and sorry i dont have 25 friends to tag here... anyone can do this... huhuhuhu... have fun thinking about urself...

its in MY HEAD!

HEARTLESS - KENYA WEST

(CHORUS)
In the night, I hear 'em talk,
the coldest story ever told
Somewhere far along this road, he lost his soul to a woman so heartless...
How could you be so heartless?
Oh... How could you be so heartless?

[Verse 1]
How could you be so, cold as the winter wind when it breeze, yo
Just remember that you talkin' to me though
You need to watch the way you talkin' to me, yo
I mean after all the things that we've been through
I mean after all the things we got into
Hey yo, I know of some things that you ain't told me
Hey yo, I did some things but that's the old me
And now you wanna get me back and you gon' show me
So you walk around like you don't know me
You got a new friend, well I got homies
But in the end it's still so lonely

[Chorus]


[Verse 2]
How could you be so Dr. Evil, you bringin' out a side of me that I dont know...
I decided we weren't gon' speak so
Why we up 3 A.M. on the phone
Why does she be so mad at me fo'
Homie I dont know, she's hot and cold
I won't stop, won't mess my groove up
'Cause I already know how this thing go
You run and tell your friends that you're leaving me
They say that they don't see what you see in me
You wait a couple months then you gon' see
You'll never find nobody better than me

[Chorus]


[Verse 3]
Talkin', talkin', talkin', talk
Baby let's just knock it off
They don't know what we been through
They don't know 'bout me and you
So I got something new to see
And you just gon' keep hatin' me
And we just gon' be enemies
I know you can't believe
I could just leave it wrong
And you can't make it right
I'm gon' take off tonight
Into the night....

JESSICA MAUBOY - Running Back (ft. Flo Rida)

(Verse 1)
These days you barely even say my name
Like you don't really feel the same
I'm wondering whats to blame
These nights, I fall asleep wondering where you are
It feels like we're falling apart
And it's totally breaking my heart

Cause if bein' with you means being alone
And never knowing when you're comin' home
Then I guess Im better off on my own

(Chorus)
But I cant move on
Cause that means forgettin, forgettin, everything we had
Instead I keep running, keep running, I keep running back
Cause I keep forgettin, forgettin, you treat me so bad
So I keep on comin, keep comin, I keep comin back

I keep comin back (I keep running back) And I keep running back (I keep comin back)
I keep comin back (I keep running back) And I keep comin, I keep running back

(Verse 2)
My friends say that I should leave you behind
And stop wasting all my time
They tell me that I'm out of my mind

But I know that what we both share is real
And that I been willing to deal
With the way that you're making me feel

Cause if being with you means being alone
And never knowin' when you're coming home
Then I guess Im better off on my own

(Chorus)


(Rap- Flo Rida)
Ma ma ma mama caught up
We not all heard the same story
Just different authors this book crazy
Always a lady looking for love where there's a maybe
We might could be together
They fight to be together
Aight to be together
Shorty yeah he cheated
You say you don't need it
Turn around and leave it
Oh he back next week
Fuss...Fight
And then the whole thing repeat like nothing ever happened
Dat was just rapping
No publishing
Shorty you knew that he aint got the same government
Lil mama can't move on
But it's her fault she struggling
She can't...move...on

(Chorus) 1x


I keep comin back (I keep running back) And I keep running back (I keep comin back)
I keep comin back (I keep running back) And I keep comin, I keep running back...
...To you

I'M SO HEARTLESS NOW... FEEL LIKE IT...
NURUL! YOU ARE SO RIGHT BOUT THE SONG..
I'M SO FEELING IT NOW... HURM...

cars!! im loving it...

I AM SO IN LOVE WITH THESE CARS... FOR NOW.. LOVE GOOGLE-INK THEM... MAKES ME HAPPY... JUST WANT TO SHARE IT... HURM... THIS IS LIKE MY WISH LIST... SERIOUSLY IF I HAVE LOTS OF MONEY ILL BUY ALL OF THESE CARS...

1ST LY!!

ALFA ROMEO!! GT... MY 1ST LOVE AS ALWAYS.. AND WILL ALWAYS BE.. THE SPEED OF THIS CAR TAKES MY BREATH AWAY..

2ND LY!!

VOLVO C30!! THE DESIGN IS SO COOL... THE SPEED?? OH, ITS SO ADORABLE!!

3RD LY!!

STORM.... HUHHU... BEEN WANTING THIS CAR SINCE THE 1ST TIME I LOOK AT IT...

4TH LY

MERC G55... NEED ME TO SAY MORE.. THE SOUND MAKES ME SHIVER TO A NEW ADVENTURE...

5TH LY

LAMBORGINI, GALLARDO... I WANT IT!! BUT U SEE THE NEXT PICTURE? YEAH I'M SCARED ILL RUINED IT BEFORE I COULD STOP FOR THE RED LIGHT... HUHUHUHU...

6TH LY!!

KOENIGSEGG.. LOOK AT THE DESIGN.. YOUR LOVING IT RIGHT?? ME TOO..

7TH LY

BUGATTI VEYRON!! SO ELEGANT.. SO STYLISH.. SPEECHLESS!!

8TH LY..

AUDI R8.. SAME LIKE THE LOMBARGINI.. I WANT IT, BUT I'AM SCARED ILL DESTROY IT...

NOTE : IM IN LOVE WITH THESE CARS FOR THE MOMENT... IN THE FUTURE MAYBE MORE... HUHUHUHU... DONT HATE THE PLAYER HATE THE GAME.. IF I HAVE ONE OF THESE CARS ILL BE DRIVING ALL AROUND THE WORLD WITH MY FRIENDS... AHAKs!

4 minutes - madonna&justin

i was tagged by Nurule Pattinson (konon).

INSTRUCTIONS :
a. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.
b. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
c. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN, NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
d. Put any comments in brackets after the song name.
e. Put this on your blog.

1. If someone says, "Is this okay?"
a la nanita nana - cheetah girls
( i have no idea)

2. How would you describe yourself?
broken- seether feat amy lee
(huhu... im always emo)

3.What do you like in a guy/girl?
shake your pom pom
( huhuhu... i like ass.. shake it shake it... huhuhuhu)

4. How do you feel today?
get that clear - akon ft brick and lace
(whoa... shake it shake it... im that girl right here)

5. What is your life's purpose?
keep on movin' - five
( erk... move what?? hurm.. move to the future?? keep on movin on anyway.. hurm... so cool!)

6. What is your motto?
Leavin - jesse McCartney
(leave her come to me... hahahahaha)

7. What do your friends think of you?
miss you - Aaliyah
(okay.. this is weird... my friends did call me and told me they miss me... huhuhu.. i miss them too)

8. What do you think of your parents?
the hypno ( power mix) - floorfilla
(there no end... hahahaha... mixing with my head)

9. What do you think about very often?
someday - Nickelback
(How the hell did we wind up like this
Why weren't we able
To see the signs that we missed
And try to turn the tables
Now the story's played out like this
Just like a paperback novel
Lets rewrite an ending that fits
Instead of a hollywood horror ) okay... dont really understand.... huhuhuhu.. but i like it...

10. What is 2+2?
Love - matt white
( 2+2=love??) okay... :/

11. What do you think of your best friends?
Is it you - cassie
(hurm... yeah, they are changing...)

12. What do you think of the person you like?
Fuck it - Eamon
( huhuhhu... wtf?? i like who?? im in love not like... different right?)

13. What is your life?
My love is never ending - brick and lace
(my love my love my love... liking this game..)

14. What do you want to be when you grow up?
SOS - Didier Sinclair
(sos?? hurm... thats so true for now)

15. What do you think of when you see the person you like?
Simpsons theme song
( erk! hahahhahahahahaha... so cute)

16. What will you dance to at your wedding?
Save our soul [Spen's main Mix + Brian tappert remix)
(wtf!! huhuhuhu... i wont dance)

17. What will they play at your funeral?
You're makin' me high - Toni Broxton
(okay... no songs at my funurel...)

18. What is your hobby/interest?
Buttons - Pussycat Dolls
(weehoo! loosen up my buttons baby, ...,..,..., but i see nothing.. im a sexy mama... hahahaha)

19. What is your biggest fear?
Break the ice - Britney spears
( hurm... what to fear for... ? heights!!)

20. What is your biggest secret?
Summer love - Justin Timbarlake
(shhhh!)

21. What do you think of your friends?
He's all that - cascada
( hurm... he is all that... my guy... huhuhu... and they too.. my friends are my lovers..)

22. What will you post this as?
4 minutes - madonna&justin

Love my ass!! i did laugh but some off it is so not true... my playerS shuffle is having some error... huhuhuhu... *wink wink...

tagging:
1. diana
2. rene
3. whoever who wants to try...huhuhu...

WHAT I REALLY MISS!!

..there are several things i miss so much...
1st ly my old home in NO, 20, JALAN LORONG MAAROF, BANGSAR..

well, not really old.. Ive been staying there since im 2 years old... 2 until 21 ( last year january 2008) = equals too 19 years?? is that right? damn my math are falling to the drain now.. huhuhuhu... hurm... Bangsar is my paradise.. i know the roads even if somebody put me without any PDA... cried there, i climb the roof top when i get depress, stroll around in the middle of the night, have some new babies welcomed there ( my nephew and nieces).. fight, you know drama drama drama ( but when we try to remember it, we just laugh)..


MY ROOM.. THE VIEW OUTSIDE IS LIKE A SECRET FOREST..
(me imaging every time i look outside there.. hmmmm.....)
THE INSIDE?? ITS HEAVEN ACTUALLY WITH MY BED AND ALL..
( the things aren't in this picture bcoZ its my last day to look around)

THE VERY TIRING STAIRS THAT I LIKE TO RUN UP AND DOWN..
( sometimes i fell really badly when i was a little girl off course.. :p)


My big lovely cupboard that sometims i used to sleep in... ( dont tell my mum that.. huhuhuhu)


my cat.. i really love this kitty... kitty has his own socks... wanna know what happen to him? my idiotic maid ( one off them) throw the kitty out the alley... i wasnt home that time... but seriously if i see that idiotic maid again ill tell her off again... and if i see my kitty again, ill take him back...

2ND HANGING OUT WITH MY school FRIENDS..

THIS IS THE MAIN PART ACTUALLY... REALLY MISS THEM.... I REALLY DO..
MY OLD SCHOOL FRIENDS... LIKE WE USED TO HANG OUT AND JUST HAVE FUN...

SARAH!!! I Love to spank her ass in school... since form 3.. huhuhuhu... and her laugh.. hurm can i discribe this for you... her laughter can remain in ur mind since the day youve heard it... it wont leave you alone...

Ummi Nadrah!!! i love her.. shes known me since 1994... now we rarely see each other.. miss her.. iskh!

and paul a.k.a pauline ( his girl name)... my close friend since 2004... even dough we've actually known each other way before that... huhuhu.. ( f.y.i i always hit him in class and he was " why lah you like to hit me" ) just bored i guess... huhuhuhu...


shatish... when in school days i thot he is gay... but after school days... after i know him now, and we became close friends now.. im positively telling you HE IS NOT GAY... huhuhuhu... seriousely, he has girlfriendS...

SITI KHALIJAH MUID! fuh! my sweet high school friend... if you need a party, u can call her anytime... she will be banging like a rockstar...


2nd MY OLD COLLEGE FRIENDS.. KPTM, BANGI..


me! shasha ( in pink), mimi ( shashaS friend), ayu ( in pink too), and aween!! ( the balck one)
all off them were the best... we used to hang out... and ignore all the rules ( well i didnt a little)...

well, not all off them i used to hang out with... some off them... but they rock!! evendough i date
their own friend.. huhuhuhuhu... my bf now...


well, the reason i close their eyes is i dont want them to kill me... huhuhuhu... act, they wear tudung.. dont want to exposed them too much without it... but seriously they are the most intelligent people you can know... ain, ma and liyana... huhuhuhu... try hanging out with them its really superfun!!


3rd MY NOW COLLEGE FRIENDS..MIIM...

and my housemates.. with aliya down this picture... well, we used too... the one wearing tudung her name is AYU, shes good on the outside but in her inside?? shes the most funniest sarcastic person you've ever met.. dont step on her head, she will step back at you with her needle deadly eyes... huhuhuhuhu... the one beside her is NURUL, ( wearing the orange spec.. obviously).. shes a little freaky first time you met her, but when you get to know her shes just normal bla bla bla... and the craziest one in the bunch... huhuhuhu...

this is ELIYA .. shes a rockstar... among me, eliya, nurul and ayu? sheS the most gosSip girl in the clan... huhuhuhuhu...
the most humble person, intelligent, funny and hardworking person you have ever met... FARAHANA RIDZUAN..

the jockers in our life.. well, before they get serious... kamal ( holding the phone) and
Uzair ( with the L.M.B)... they are also the most intelligent and funniest people in class... yeah, Rizal too... ( dunno wheres his pic.)


me, shafinaz, and natasha hussein.. the best days.. when we are close... before the drama drama drama... wish we can get togather like we used too... :)



AND 2ND LAST, THE PEOPLE I MISS THE MOST ALWAYS...
EVEN DOUGH THEY ARE ALWAYS IN ME AND WITH ME... HUHUHUHU




MY NEPHEW AND NIECE.

MUMMY , MY BRO, SIS IN LAW AND MY NEPHEW..
MY NEPHEW AND MY MUM...


THE HAPPY GATHERING DAYS...





THE LAST AND THE MOST.. WILL ALWAYS BE..

THE LOVE OF MY LIFE..

CUPCAKES !!!!

HIM... THE ONLY HIM... MISS HIM... MISS SPENDING TIME WITH HIM... MISS IT...
LOVE HIM SO MUCH... DAMN IT! NEED TO SEE HIM...

banned pizza hut.. for dunno how long... estupido..

hurm, where can i start...

PIZZA HUT, SHAH ALAM. near the hospital..
damn! stupid assholes are working there... went there with my college friends last year.. me, nurul, eliya and ayu.. then we ordered the new stuff, with the eggs and all.. k i forgot what weve ordered.. then went our water arrived with our food, the stupid dumb waitrees didnt give us our fork and spoon.. nurul askd me should we ask or should we take it... and i was so annoyed with the dumb waitress i just told my friend loudly, " no lah we have to get it our self, over there" then i started pointing at the counter infront of the waitress... she understand what i meant so slow, she just took our fork and spoon.. with the innocent smile, hah! stupid... after then rad told nurul i was being sarcarstic infront of the waitress.. thats the first... then before that we ordered somekind of tempura.. we allready finishd eating.. i was so damn pissed off i just told my friends instead of waiting for the food to be processd we should just go to the counter and just pay up the bills without the food that didnt come... the new food stick!! so my points for the pizza goes down to -45%... we just went to the counter and told the cashier that we canceled our order... she ask her other friends, they forgot about that... so damn stupid...

PIZZA HUT, Taman tun dr.ismail...

went with ayu there last friday.. it was nice at first... went in there... sat at the place we wanted to sit.. then the worst is there... theres a plate on the table.. which the waiter doesnt pick up... which is really really dirty... i just put it aside... then when our food came... we ordered spagetti... the stupid guy waiter ( who acts like a bitch) put our food really hard like its so rude... i was so shocked like im having a heart attack.. i was so mad.. then our other food, cut fries was so late... and we are so late to go back to the office, i just told ayu we should just go... went to the cashier... told her we're canceling our fries... then i just told her how rude the bicth/bustard was to us... she smiled and appologize... hah! i told my friend thats the last pizza hut for me... stupid amatures...

all i wanted..

well, even dough the Christmas has already past... i still can wish and hope right? hurm... what i wanted its not really a wish but a hope...
ive been sick the whole day today... at the same time ive been thinking bout my relationship.. he is still the greatest... no doubt bout that... but sometimes i just wonder does he really love me like i did? or am i just hitting the wall with a rotten chair? no thats not right... hurm... am i trying to put the meat in the chickens hole? pushing him to love me? yes, i do love him and yes he did say he loves me too.. but i really miss him... the old him... always wanted to be with me... always laugh.. always talk a lot (which i really like him to do it now)... you know before our first annyversary which is in year 2006 he always called me... even if its hard for him to call he will try his best... ive tried (but i wont stop) to make it sparkle again... sometimes the way he acted towards me really makes my day down the drain.. i know he did try... but i want him to try not because he wanted me to be happy, i wanted him to try and have fun with me because he wants to.. i dont know... i just hope i can meet him now... be with him... i really miss him...
argh! this doesnt make sense... whats wrong with him... can he just call me now... damn it!